I Heart Conversations

Chat 51Notes

Yogurt is good for your poo
  • Patrick: "Now let me tell you something - I know a thing or two about lady poos" - Jamie Lee Curtis
  • Cristina: Lady poos smell like blueberries on a musky dew morning.
  • Patrick: Oh is that right?
  • Cristina: Yep. Did you know Jamie Lee Curtis is in charge of all the lady poo, ever?
  • Cristina: If a lady wants to poo they have to submit a written form to Jamie Lee and get the poo authorized, then if she approves she winks and nods in your direction and BAM you are shitting yourself uncontrollably.
  • Patrick: It sounds very...regulated.
  • Cristina: Mmhmm. So who's in charge of the man poos?
  • Patrick: Nobody. It's just straight up anarchy.

Chat 16Notes

Well this devolved quickly
  • Cristina: I watched Pawn Stars today
  • Cristina: I am
  • Cristina: sorry
  • Patrick: Hahahaha
  • Patrick: Baby
  • Patrick: Why...would you apologize to me
  • Patrick: for that?
  • Cristina: Because I am
  • Cristina: your son
  • Patrick: I am sorry that i - WHAAAA>?!
  • Cristina: Oh god this is awkward
  • Patrick: And probably illegal
  • Cristina: Probably? You mean DEFINITELY
  • Patrick: Sorry, I meant definitely illegal....probably *awesome*
  • Cristina: GROSS DAD
  • Patrick: MM DADS
  • Cristina: Now them nads
  • Cristina: and dads
  • Cristina: Dad nads
  • Patrick: Nads-n-dads
  • Cristina: Meat buffet
  • Patrick: Meat heeeaven
  • Patrick: Heavin' meat
  • Cristina: Meat heaver taint tapper
  • Patrick: Can we
  • Patrick: stop

Photo 10Notes
Cutest. Costume. Ever.  Zoom

Cutest. Costume. Ever. 


Chat

Sexy Risk
  • Cristina: The doctor asked me if I had engaged in any risky sexual behavioral lately.
  • Patrick: For some reason I hear that and immediately think about having sex while skydiving.
  • Patrick: Or maybe kissing next to a nuclear reactor.
  • Cristina: That is some seriously risky sexual behavior.

Photo 89Notes
Zoom


Photo
Best name ever? Zoom

Best name ever?


Quote

Have you ever noticed that the face you make while whistling is the *same* face you would make if you were sucking a tiny dick?

– Patrick
Chat 5Notes

Keep on Strokin'
  • Andrew: Man, something smells like maple syrup
  • Cristina: I can't smell anything
  • Cristina: Maybe you are going to have a stroke
  • Cristina: First sign
  • Andrew: I can hear my grandma whispering
  • Andrew: "The bananas...the pines"

Quote

When you go to London, could you get me a souvenir Eiffel Tower?

– Steve
Chat

Bones & Bonin'
  • Cristina: Ah the Xyphoid Process...
  • Cristina: It's probably the coolest bone in the body
  • Patrick: Y'know
  • Patrick: I think I am the coolest bone in YOUR body
  • Cristina: *slow clap*

17
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